I'm out of peanut butter n' chocolate ice cream. D: And here my sweet tooth flares up... though usually, when I'm having an attack of "OMG NEED SWEET" it's just because I'm very nervous. And, y'know, planning out a backpacking trip and panicking over informing my folks that I have no interest at all in following in their footsteps like they're trying to force me to... makes me nervous.

What do you think?

I dunno what I'm so nervous about. I suppose it's because I've been a people-pleaser all my life; for the past 18 years, I've been shoving myself aside to please other people. While I really and honestly do LOVE making people smile and laugh, I'm tired of being a golden child. I suppose that all of this crap that Dad and Karen level at me is because my brother "failed" in life--he went couchsurfing at 16 and hasn't come back home yet, he dropped out of college two weeks in, he lives in a van. But he's happy! I admire Josh's courage. Of course, he had friends who wanted to shelter him. I don't have any myself (though I wish with all my heart that I did!)

Mr Aaron on Digihitch says that I should get out and chase my dreams if I want to. And that some of the deepest, most positive relationships he's ever formed have been with the people he's met on the road. Mr Lightfoot says the same thing. What do you think?


I used to have this little necklace with a cross made out of olive-wood. I really loved that little cross; it smelled wonderful, it kept bugs away. But at the time, it didn't hold any special meaning to me. It's only been in the past five years that I've become curious about spirituality of all sorts. I'm not a Christian, but I do quite like Jesus. My main issue with actual Christianity comes with the fact that I view God as a woman, because that is what helps me forge a positive connection with God--when I view God as a loving mother figure, I feel closer to Her. A vengeful, angry, violent male God only drives me away. I think that if you want to connect with whatever-your-vision-of-God-is, you should connect to it out of love and curiosity, rather than fear and terror.

I think that's the problem with most super-religious folks today: they take life too seriously and they approach religion with fear and anger in their hearts rather than love and peace.

Maybe I'm just weird.